So Far
April thus far has been fairly “normal”, and I use that term loosely. GBU, one-on-one’s, L’Arche, meeting up with Compiegne acquaintances and friends. Marie, who I met through JAO and Virginia Hemmerle, came over to meet for sharing and prayer, which is always a blessing. I met up different days with a few UTC students outside the regular GBU loop. Had coffee with Valerie from L’Arche, which again, huge blessing. She has a beautiful testimony and presence and much wisdom on how to serve well at L’Arche. Thursday night I headed to Mozaik’s party, the student group of which Natacha is president. Several GBU students were going and had invited me and it was a blast (even if humorous to me) to join them on the dance floor. I love dancing and it takes all of 60 seconds for me to warm up to bustin’ a move. Last week I was hardly ever home and I have given up cooking for myself beyond the basic and simple. I busted my tail the first weekend of April and week following so I could take a retreat at the McAuley’s house. Wonderfully it worked out for me to be there Friday afternoon through Sunday morning and I experienced most of the time in silence holed up in their basement. Between letter writing, reading, journaling, praying, thinking, oh my, it was divine and much needed. This week I am at L’Arche in the afternoons rather than mornings and students are on vacation (I know, yet again…). This has opened up a great opportunity for me to press forward on my Greek. I fell behind but am slowly getting back on track and if I can say this, really enjoying it. Continue to keep this endeavor in your prayers. I’ve also been busy getting FAFSA for next year finally done, tickets bought, and final month plans made and in the works. What prompted this blog in fact was my purchase of my final ticket home—July 8th. I don’t really know what to do with that. So, I have it. It’s official, I’m leaving France. There…
Students dancing at Mozaik's party
Natacha in all her glory :)
Julien, Jacque, me, and Chantal during mosaic, the craft
What’s Coming
This coming weekend I’ll be joining Nari, Armel, and Clement for GBU’s Congres National near Tours, France. The topic for the weekend is “Bible without Borders,” considering the place the Bible is legally not allowed around the globe and the places it is culturally and legally not allowed in France. Nari, Armel, and I have already spoken about taking some time this weekend to strategize for responsibility sharing and turnover for the year to come, and I am excited overall at the momentum GBU has going. Pray for that to continue.
Between now and May 8, there is the regular activities of the week with L’Arche and GBU. April 15 I have a dinner meeting my place with Joel and Francois to plan for the next and final JAO before summer vacation begins. This Thursday is one of the L’Arche assistant’s birthdays, which I have learned normally gets her down. Last week our decoration group made a birthday poster, and Valerie and I have a surprise in the works for her, Martine, Thursday morning and at gouter (snack) time. Pray she may be blessed. Another thing on the L’Arche front, as of next week I will not be there on Wednesdays. This is sad for me because I really look forward to mosaic with Chantal but for all the rest going on, it is necessary and I have both L’Arche’s and GEM’s blessing. Francis and I are also going to meet with a higher-up before I leave in May to discuss my time there and how they would prefer I transition out of my volunteer position. I’m also working out seeing a couple long-time GEM missionaries as well as visiting Faculte Libre de Theologie Evangelique a Vaux-sur-Seine, just west of Paris. I’ll be in Berlin, Germany April 30-May 3 for GEM’s first organization-wide Muslim ministry training. I am very excited about this and cannot wait to give you a report. May 5 I will attend the L’Oise Pastorale (L’Oise area pastor’s bi-monthly meeting) to make a brief announcement about the Passion worship conference and distribute publicity. Pray for reception to the information and encouragement of their students to attend. May 8 I leave for the USA until May 26. During that time I will be helping out with and attending my sister’s art show, going to her graduation, participating in my former roommates’ wedding festivities, and making some headway on details for my July/August move, transition, beginning of studies, and finding a job. I will also be getting in touch with supporters to make plans for seeing you all in July! I am very excited to share face to face with so many of you who have loved and supported me well here.
Prayer Requests
Last week I had lunch with Nari and Xue, and they found out that Xue will be doing a semester abroad in Switzerland in the same city Nari has applied for an internship. Nari has been praying for that opportunity so that she can encourage Xue as she is trying to believe. I ask you to pray explicitly that Xue comes to belief this year and that Nari may be allowed to walk with her with all joy and energy in her first steps. I cannot reiterate enough—THIS IS A SIGNIFICANT PRAYER REQUEST! Nari has continued to follow my time with Xue and has been praying for us. Pray that Xue and I may have some pointed discussions in the next few weeks and that Nari will be granted the next privilege of walking alongside her. How personally sweet for me this would be.
I am also hoping/praying to organize a Muslim ministry dinner and roundtable for a handful of GBU students. A couple are already very interested, and given their almost constant contact with many Muslim students, I sense this time would be greatly beneficial. Pray for me to be able to get that organized and facilitated between now and the end of May.
Pray also for final JAO planning, the Passion World Tour Paris stop, ongoing relationships here in Compiegne, and so much more, I can’t even keep up with it. I am hoping to see the Prevotes, and at the least Olivia, before I leave May 8 and continue to keep them lifted up. Madame Bataille asks about them and she is a great encouragement to me here to have the hard conversations. Thad McAuley asked me if there was anything they were afraid of, fears? (a prevalent issue in France). No, I said, they are so happy-go-lucky joyful people. I forgot one thing—Jean-Stephane won’t step foot in a cemetery. He’s afraid of them. Madame Bataille brought this to mind. Perhaps this is an opportunity, I don’t know if that door will be opened; but pray.
Poems
Metro
You notice that there is no noise
sauf les americains
Who are just so excited and don’t know better
And the hormonally-driven anxious teenagers shouting for attention
You notice that no one smiles
and there is certainly never laughter
You notice that everyone is reading something
and you feel out of place if you’re not
You notice that everyone exits walking the same quick pace that the train parts
You notice that you learn the manners of the metro,
how to enter, exit, sit, stand
You learn to ignore others
and get yourself where you need to go
You learn to occupy your space
and neglect that it is shared
You learn how to avoid direct eye contact
but still manage to people watch
You learn to stop looking out the window
for a glimpse of sunlight or someone you know
Because this is after all a black tunnel
You stop listening to the voices and conversations around you
You start automatically attaching pod to ear
You stop smiling even when the accordion-player begs you to
You start trying to blend in by looking devoid of emotion
You stop wondering how long it takes to get from place to place
You start allowing a standard 45 minutes, apologizing if late, roaming if early
That’s the life of the metro
Its power to which we succumb
Without thinking
Because we need to get to wherever it is we’re going
Forget the journey
Repetition
And it is sometimes
in the repeating
That we can remember
Jesus, je sais que tu es la
It takes the melody and the silence
to recall for us his presence
Because prone we are to forget, or neglect, or ignore
Baptism
Wash me in the waters
O Thou Spirit most divine
Refresh me and renew me
Reminding, the life coursing thro’ ‘tis thine
Wash me in the waters
Cleansing, may they be
Recalling that my choice of thee
Doth bind for eternity
Wash me in the waters
Fresh baptismal flow
Surrounding and engulfing be its
Glisten and its glow
Wash me in the waters
Making me anew
Reborn and re-envisioned
Yours again, me in you
Oh wash me in the waters
Which for me is life
Yours I come, leaving at the altar
My human grief and strife
For thou O God, art Lord alone
Of me and all the land
Of all the peoples and the places
Countless as the ever-baptized sand
Entering Silence
Profound is the silence ever widening before me
Evidencing the distractions cluttering space
inviting and wanting all that is holy to enter
A gift to sit and hear only the creaking of wood and passing of outside cars
as silence falls and reigns in a space
Meant for awed worship
Entering Silence Two
The bell tolls, but unheard
Only a mark of my mind,
That it has begun, this retreat into returning as we came
Silence
What glory is it, I admit,
To have left behind all that would pull and entangle
For prolonged moments of being
That it could always be as this,
Friday evening falling
With no thoughts of where to be, what to do, what’s forgotten
Only Be is what lies before me
And it is as if my entire body, down to the nerves in my feet know
Beautiful is this glory
All that floods me now is the joy of what is to come
Amplified by the joy of what is now
How great thou art
How great it is
Simultaneous wonders to me
Silence falls, sun remains,
And flooding in, come they both
When I Stop to Think
Someday you’ll wake up
And be 30, 50, 80
Will it all have been one pursuit after another
Without end
Continuous striving
And no rest
May there be points of conclusion and closure
With ability to look back and rejoice
Forward and dream
Down and delight
May it all be lived as a gracious gift
Unsure, but in need of fidelity
Commitment
Grace
And Love
